SILENCE

Taking the task of speaking only when necessary, how interesting - to be silent inside and out.

To cease unnecessary outer talking is not hard for me; I live and spend my days alone for the most part. It is the inner talking that is standing out. I woke this morning remembering the task and as I got ready for the day, a conversation with myself about how I was to write today ensued. Should I not write this week? An agreement was reached. It is the unnecessary inner talking I am most interested in. This vantage point is fascinating on a deeply personal, organic level. My listening mechanisms have become tuning forks. The inner talking is matter, material with weight and sensation.

The lonesome feeling and sadness I experienced all week is experienced differently now. Ordinarily I just put it in a box, close the lid and shove it in a closet. It is out of it's box now. Given the respect of being heard, the experience has moved to a new level; no longer muffled it has value and is no longer a tugging nuisance.

Not speaking unless necessary also brings me to a place I have not explored in this way before in my external work; a creaky old door has opened and magically cobwebs have cleared from internal rooms, windows are opening and letting in light where I have been rooting out material for the new book in the dark. This new project, long considered and long delayed, is in progress now - the beginning, middle and end falling into place. What is unnecessary sorted from what is necessary.

Peace