The Compulsive Giver

“Every man has a certain feature in his character which is central. It is like an axle round which all his ‘false personality’ revolves. Every man’s personal work must consist in struggling against this chief fault.” – George Gurdjieff (as quoted by Peter Ouspensky, In Search of the Miraculous, p.233)

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Disclaimer:  Mr Vaknin is not associated with nor recommended as an authority by the myself or =, as far I I am aware, by any Gurdjieff group.

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"Some narcissists are ostentatiously generous -- they donate to charity, lavish gifts on their closest, abundantly provide for their nearest and dearest, and, in general, are open-handed and unstintingly benevolent. How can this be reconciled with the pronounced lack of empathy and with the pernicious self-preoccupation that is so typical of narcissists? The act of giving enhances the narcissist's sense of omnipotence, his fantastic grandiosity, and the contempt he holds for others. It is easy to feel superior to the supplicating recipients of one's largesse. Narcissistic altruism is about exerting control and maintaining it by fostering dependence in the beneficiaries. (From the book "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited" by Sam Vaknin)